“OMG, WTF, NO WAY” True Blood: Recap Of Episode 5 In GIFs

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    Last week’s episode of True Blood left us off with Sookie stopping Warlow with the ball of light in her hand, and calling him by name. With a cliff-hanger like that we couldn’t wait for this week’s episode to begin!

    Before Sookie could being to rip Warlow “a new one” he lets out a cry for help and something that we weren’t expecting. He confesses his love for Sookie and that they were destined to be together. WTF?!

    After confessing his love to her, Warlow reveals another big secret, but this one is bigger than the first. He tells Sookie that he actually saved her life the night that her parents were killed. He claims that they were going to kill her so instead he reacted by killing them.

    Sookie calls what she thinks is a bluff on Warlow’s buff and zaps his ass with her ball of light. Something strange triggers off inside of Bill when Warlow is zapped. This can only mean that Bill is Warlow’s maker.

    They take us back to 3500 BC where we see Warlow and his slampiece, but he casually leaves to go have so casual sex with Lilith. Lilith gets a whiff of his fairy scent so she turns him. New to the change, Warlow goes off on a killing/feeding frenzy throughout his entire village. He lets Niall live, but when returns to kill Lilith she is gone.

    We then flashback to reality and see Jess all emotionally damaged after she just killed all of Andy’s fairy children. With all the fairy blood running through her body, Jess pounces onto Bill and kisses him.

    Andy shows up at Bill’s to see all of his fairy children’s dead bodies scattered all over the place. He manages to find one child still breathing so gives her a drop of V and thankfully recuses her!

    Governor Burrell’s new slampiece, Sarah, tries to get him to send Willa to camp and to also get down on one knee and propose. After getting flat-out rejected, Sarah casually makes her way over to Jason’s to save his soul and, of course, do him like there’s no tomorrow in the hottest sex scene ever!

    Emotionally damaged Jess casually makes her way over to Jason’s as well, but is surprised to find Sarah there. They end up getting into a bitch fight and Sarah sends Jess’s ass to Vamp Camp. 

    Sookie decides to confide in Lafayette and vents to her about what Warlow said to her.  She admits that she sort of believes that Warlow loves her. The two do some calling thingy on Sookie’s parents and we see a flashback of Warlow asking Sookie’s parents to let him make her his princess and turn her into a fairy-vamp like himself. 

    Mr. Stackhouse freaked out on Warlow and believes the only solution is to kill Sookie, which is exactly what Warlow said! Mr. Stackhouse’s spirit takes over Lafayette’s body to kill Sookie. The episode ends with Sookie gasping for air as her father attempts to drown her.

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