By now you’ve heard of the “Ban Bossy” campaign created by the Girl Scouts of USA and headed by Facebook executive and former Treasury Department official Sheryl Sandberg (also founder of the non-profit LeanIn.org) that aims to abolish the word commonly used to describe women and girls in leadership positions.
Or like, used on the playground when you were 5-years-old.
Sandberg even enlisted the help of famous friends like Beyonce, Jennifer Garner, and the wrap dress godmother Diane von Furstenberg to help her ban the word from life, because as we know, bossy is like the one word we totally need to be banning in this feminism space.
Like, totally. Right?
Forget the other words emblematic of the degradation and invalidation of women like bitch, slut or *gasp* black feminist (which should not be banned but is commonly used as shade to invalidate women of color, because of course academia tells us WOC’s issues aren’t real). Bossy is not OK. And we’re not going to stand for it.
Sarcasm aside, we first have to applaud these high-profile women for taking a stand in asserting their authority while dismissing a negative nom de guerre put in place for women in leadership positions.
But dare I say the campaign is a bit misguided? Should we not be tackling other major issues when it comes to sexist labeling and battling the omnipresent patriarchy? Should I have to give up the word bossy to honor women who are the boss because a 7-year-old threw what is now a sexist epithet at me when I wouldn’t let him take his turn on the slide in 2nd grade?
Nope. And frankly, I’m not ready to.
I’m not sure if you recall, but back in 2006, Kelis took a word that I had never thought of being used negatively and made it into what one might call the “bad bitch” anthem for women who take care of their business.
Dare I say, again, that Kelis already reclaimed the word? Threw it out to the world of hip-pop as a replacement for “baddest bitch?” Could we say Kelis was eight years ahead of Sandberg when she decided to campaign for bossy instead of against it?
Maybe. It probably wasn’t that deep. Kelis probably used the word because, for many black women, bossy isn’t used disparagingly, but as a celebration of women who are THE boss.
Like the campaign’s sweetheart Beyonce.
Dare I say, again, that “banning bossy” for me and other women and girls who attribute it to being a positive leader may be more detrimental than barrier breaking? Because I’m totally among those women who claimed bossy as my “taking care of shit” anthem; I’m not ready to give it up.
Like Twitter user and writer Ashley Ford said:
Most personality traits can be good or bad. We shouldn’t “ban bossy”, we should teach girls to develop their bossiness in a positive way.
— Ashley Ford (@iSmashFizzle) March 11, 2014
Agreed. Maybe Sandberg and the Girl Scouts of America could learn a thing or two from Kelis’ “Bossy” and revamp their campaign. Being bossy could totally mean that…
In the boardroom, the courtroom, the conference room, the bedroom. Hey, feminists are allowed to have sex too, you know? Or maybe being bossy means…
…you’re the first woman to become president. The first woman to become CEO of a company. Or, let’s make this personal, the first woman to serve on Facebook’s board, Sheryl Sandberg. And when you’re the first, when you’re in charge, you’re usually also the one who…
…is calling the shots, making the plans, setting the tone. Changing the world…and in Kelis’ case, setting the trends. Because, quite simply…
So save your playground epithet. It means something totally different to me.
And so does this anthem. Plus, that little shoulder move, that bathing suit, that haircut, that rock…well, this entire video never gets old.
I’m just saying.
SOURCE: Giphy, YouTube, Twitter
