COCONUT CREEK, FL—"I'm back, Bayshore High," 18-year-old Henry Doyle announced as he pulled his mother's Toyota Camry slowly into the parking lot normally reserved for faculty, emerging with a knowing grin. "Bet you never thought you'd see the likes of me again!"
From: www.theonion.com
COCONUT CREEK, FL—Less than five months after graduating from Bayshore High School, 18-year-old Henry Doyle returned to his lowly alma mater Monday a wise and conquering college freshman.
"I'm back, Bayshore High," Doyle announced as he pulled his mother's Toyota Camry slowly into the parking lot normally reserved for faculty, emerging with a knowing grin. "Bet you never thought you'd see the likes of me again!"
After pausing to behold any students who might have taken notice of his momentous arrival, Doyle determined that many were too intimidated to say hello or even look in his general direction, so he marched indoors.
According to sources, the Nova Southeastern University freshman spent the next two hours striding like a Roman general through the halls of his former school, smiling at distracted teachers, nodding at confused members of the janitorial staff, and leaning back against the school's trophy case for nearly 25 minutes.
"Some of the kids who don't know who I am will probably just think I'm some hip, young teacher," the returning hero said as he was repeatedly pushed aside by a crowd of students rushing to get to class. "And I bet those who do know me will be shocked at how much taller and more mature I look. Some of them might even flip out.'