Justin Bieber is a dude that is always sunny and happy.
DETAILS: Justin Bieber Robbed! Personal Footage May Leak Soon
That wasn’t the case yesterday, though. You see, someone stole a laptop belonging to Mr. Bieber. A laptop that contained private material. The pop star was clearly distraught over the crime. He tweeted this to his millions of followers:
MAN, who could do such a thing to someone as cool as Justin Bieber? And more importantly, what exactly was on that computer. It had to be something bad considering that he tweeted about it, right?
Luckily we got answers.
VIDEO: Justin Bieber & Big Sean “As Long As You Love Me”
We have a super secret source that was able to see Bieber’s computer and verify what kind of crazy stuff is on it.
Are you curious to find out what Bieber’s been hiding? Well, scroll down and find out!
Sean Kingston’s long lost Back 2 Life album.
Eh, as it turns out, it’s not that good either. The album consists of a song with Akon and 12 different remixes of “Beautiful Girl.”
A sex tape with Mariah Yeater.
When news came out that Bieber’s private laptop was stolen, everyone just assumed there were videos and pics of Selena Gomez. WRONG! There was no Selena footage. However, there was a juicy Hulk Hogan-style sex tape on there.
Every single existing Justin Timberlake song, image and video clip on the Internet.
Um…do we really have to explain this one?
Pictures of Bieber and Tupac smoking weed on a boat in Cuba.
Who the f*ck needs a hologram when you can just kick it with the real thing? Bieber and Pac have become quite the twosome.
Four years of ghost-written raps that Jay-Z would eventually use.
Is it just a coincidence that Bieber’s come up came around the same time Jay-Z’s music started to improve again? (*cough* Kingdom Come *cough*)? We don’t think so!
Coca Cola’s original recipe.
Coca Cola’s recipe is one of the most guarded formulas in history. We saw it, though. Turns out it’s just Sprite and RC Cola mixed together. *Shrug*
A picture of God.
We all know that Justin Bieber is extremely religious, and he has strong relationship with God. We just never realized how close.
Links to his 50 favorite Worldstar fights.
WORLDSTAAAAAAAR!
A half completed application to the Masonic brotherhood.
Dude, let us tell you something. That form is no joke. It’s like War and Peace long.
Embarrassing footage of a drunk, shirtless Justin Bieber mouthing along to Carly Rae Jepsen’s entire Kiss album, in front of his mirror, while wearing some of those animal print leggings that Lil Wayne likes wearing.
Um…OK, this could be bad if it leaks.
