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If Rick Ross died today … remember him like Rabbi Rozay? 

Probably not. 

Rick Ross’ The Black Bar Mitzvah almost exploded the internet, but that was until people actually listened the mixtape. 

Rick Ross definitely has his “blackness” on lock by spitting a lot of sh*t talking (one of black people’s favorite pastimes), especially in the intro, but his Black Bar Mitzvah mixtape didn’t have me co-signing with adlibs like “hell yeah, f*cking right!” 

It was more like, “What in the hell? Is this the f*cking right mixtape?” 

Rick Ross’ take on Chief Keef’s Back From The Dead banger “Don’t Like” was lackluster and less appealing than his take on Chief Keef’s GBE homie Lil Reese’s “Us” remix.

And “Us” is probably the hottest track on Rick’s new mixtape, thanks to Young Chop, of course. 

Besides the countless references to Jewish defenders, jewelers, and lawyers, The Black Bar Mitzvah doesn’t possess the same charm, originality, lyrical content, or effort as Rich Forever.  

Rich Forever felt like an album, and unfortunately, The Black Bar Mitzvah feels like one of those free mixtapes you throw away three steps after being forced to take it.

My assessment is kind of harsh, but I know Ricky’s potential, and T.B.B.M felt rushed. 

For the hour you listened to Rozay’s Rich Forever, Ricky took the listener on a ride and actually had you feeling “rich.”

Unlike Rich Forever, The Black Bar Mitzvah definitely doesn’t have my black ass wanting a Bat Mitzvah at 25 years old, but Drake’s “H.Y.F.R” video!?

Now, THAT had a biddie wanting to convert. 

Black people are culturally over the top (blame it on the pigment) and Jewish Bar Mitzvahs are culturally over the top (blame it on the Torah), which equals the perfect formula for an outlandishly great compilation, but Rozay fell short. 

Bar Mitzvahs are about celebrating life and coming of age, none of which are conveyed on the 18 mediocre tracks Rozay presented. 

I even asked my Jewish friend and she co-signed by telling me at least three over the top, down right insane, stories about her Bat Mitzvah. I’m talking three cakes (not including an over-sized Torah cake), a buffet of desserts (not to mention the smorgasbord of food), and an American Express ice sculpture (Yes, an AMEX ice sculpture).

I definitely love Rick, don’t get me wrong, but this mixtape didn’t capture the essence of a classic Jewish Bar Mitzvah.

Maybe next time Rick should stay away from a Bar Mitzvah and try his hand at a Quinceañera, for his Mexican constituents. I heard those are WAY more turnt up anyway. 

All I know is, I hope God forgives Rick Ross for this mediocre mixtape. 

Shalom. 

~Brittany Lewis 

Brittany Lewis is the Music Editor at GlobalGrind and a Howard University Alumna. Brittany considers herself seasoned on all the pop culture ish that matters. Follow her on Twitter @Buttercup_B.