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Bite me!  To bite or lust…that is the question…until the next moon!

Eclipse – 3 howls

by Jennice Fuentes

Can we all get along???  Really, must there always be this conflict between the Volturi  and other less connected vampires,  the pack of wolves and the Cullens, the Newborns and the older folks, Edward  and Victoria, Jacob and Edward,…really, can we all settle our anger and frustrations and shake hands and sing kumbaya at a great mountainside campsite?

And clearly the answer is no, not until the story is over…and some things must still happen before we call get to hold hands and dance around a bonfire…so for the time being this story must continue moving forward and in the direction that is all too well known to the very loyal readers of Stephenie Meyer’s best seller series. 

The Twilight Saga: Eclipse, the third and almost last installment of the uber popular Meyer Twilight Series, is the most engaging and lighthearted of the bunch.  From the get go, the script is full of grammatical bonbons that at the very least, will make you crack up.  And I bet you never stopped to think that the vampire divorce rate is lower than the human divorce rate…

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The Twilight Series: Eclipse starts where the last one left off: Edward Cullen (Robert Pattinson), the soigne vampire who is in love with the lovely Bella Swan (Kristen Stewart), very much wants to make Bella his wife and Bella very much wants to join the vampire ranks…and consummate his love for Edward…who isn’t having any of that until  they get married because he is an old school kind of guy.  I guess when you are hundred of years old, habits are hard to die…even if you are undead.

And this is just what’s going on in their hearts…don’t forget you also have what’s going on in the rest of the West coast… Bad things are happening in Seattle where messy crimes have convinced the Cullens that Victoria is busy organizing an army of Newborns – newly minted vampires – to get back at Edward for turning her true love into ash.  These newborns are so new to the blood sucking business that they are practically like baby sharks and just as uncontrollable.  So the entire idea seems like an oxymoron: an army of undisciplined out-of-control newborn vampires?  This does not make me feel even a little safer than two sentences ago…  So, this young army is coming to Forks to get Bella, which forces vampire Edward and werewolf Jacob (Taylor Lautner) to enter into a truce and work together to face the enemy and protect the women they both love.

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Under the wise and able hands of director David Slade (Hard Candy), this story keeps moving forward at a pace that is sure to satisfy and which reminded me how little fun we had under New Moon.  All three leads acquit themselves quite honorably: Pattinson is still a dream boat, Stewart has become a beauty who I can see two hunks killing for  and Lautner, well, he has no fear for he is the hottest new hunk this side of the Atlantic…by many nautical miles…and expect the rest of the Cullen family to still look like they stepp