This week the Oxford English Dictionary added ‘LOL,’ ‘OMG,’ and ‘FYI’ to its records. The decline of civilization may be soon to follow. Apparently, the Oxford dictionary only adds words which are used in every day language. In that case, while we’re adding instant messaging acronyms to the bible of vocabulary knowledge, we may as well add some of these. Check them out!
1) Internest (in-ter-nest)
A concoon of pillows, blankets, duvets, and comfy things you surround yourself in to prepare for long hours on the internet.
EX: I would have a social life it wasn’t for this internest.
2) Safe Sexting (Safe Sex-ct-ing)
Applying a password to your phone, social networking pages, or IM accounts to ensure family and significant others do not catch you sending or receiving risqué images and texts to others.
EX: How did everyone get this picture of you with your pants down? Don’t you practice safe sexting?
3) Beardo (Bee-er-doe)
A strange man (or woman, though more rare) with obscene amounts of facial hair.
EX: Don’t go down that street. There are some sketchy beardo’s walking around there.
4) Froday (Fro-day)
The Friday you wake up and realize it’s time for a haircut.
EX: “Wanna go to the mall?”
“Can’t, it’s Froday.”
“Yeah, I can see that…”
5) Celebrity Lay (Ce-le-bri-ty Lay)
A specific celebrity you and your significant other mutually agree that it would be okay to have sex with should the two of you ever meet in public and have a one night stand.
EX: “Honey, I would never cheat on you…unless it was with Rihanna because, you know, we already established that that was my celebrity lay….right?”
6) Sugar Honey Iced Tea (Shu-ger Hon-ee I-sed Tee)
EX: Man, I can’t believe we have to work on Sunday. This is one big ol’ glass of sugar honey iced tea.
7) Russian Toilette
When you sit down to have a bowel movement and you see that there are only a couple of squares of toilet paper left but you go for it anyways, hoping there will be enough to clean up.
EX: “Yo, I just went number 2 and it was a total Russian Toilette. I ended up cutting it pretty close.”
8) WTF (Duh-bull Yoo Tee Eff)
What the f***?
EX: “I can’t believe you passed out on my kitchen table last night. WTF, man?”
9) XiO (ex I Oo)
Kisses, boners and hugs. Used as a replacement for the less erotic “XOXO”.
EX: Honey, I love you and can’t wait to see you this Friday. XiO.
10) Traffuck (Tra-fuck)
Traffic, but with an even more negative connotation.
EX: “Looks like I won’t be home for awhile. I’m stuck.”
“Stuck in what?”
“Oh, that’s the worst kind.”