The Lord Of The Dance once said, “I am not an egomaniac like a lot of people say. But I am the world’s best dancer.”
But my question is to the Lord Of The Dance, are you the world’s SUPREME best dancer?
If you missed Omarion’s dance sequence on last night’s BET Hip-Hop Awards, my GAWD you lost.
VIDEOS: 2012 BET Hip-Hop Awards Best Performances Of The Night
Omarion’s dance interpretation could be compared to a mash up between a ballerina meets twinkle toes, splashed with a little Rich Forever holy ghost.
I totally respect Omarion’s art, but I couldn’t help but laugh, laugh really hard. There was something about watching Omarion seem so eager to pirouette around a shirtless Rick Ross, that had me praying for it all to end.
According to Omarion’s tweet last night, “you suckas got served.”
Although most of us our laughing now, there are a few dance lovers who want to master Omarion’s body intellect, so I decided to offer a How-To guide to Mastering Maybach O’s Body Intellect:
1. Bend & Stretch– Before performing any supreme dance moves, one must properly prepare their body to do “supreme” sh*t, so make sure you breathe, stretch, and shake (doing the dougie will suffice if one cannot complete all three).
2. Bikram Yoga– Warning if you have a perm IMMEDIATELY skip to step #3, if not, make sure you hit up at least one class. For all of you who don’t know what Bikram Yoga is, it’s basically “Hot Yoga.” Asians have been doing it for mad long and if you haven’t noticed, they “be killin” America’s Best Dance Crew.
3. Begin warming up to the classic American fiddle “Skip To Ma Lou.” – Omarion had the skip on lock, this is an essential element to mastering one’s body intellect, if one cannot master the skip, one will never become a supreme dancer.
4. Remove 4 Ribs– I hope you don’t think a supreme dancer can possess supreme movement linguistics with all their ribs. Remove a couple ribs and watch yourself fly.
5. Watch The Karate Kid – You cannot master every dance move in the world like Omarion did in under 5.6 seconds without watching The Karate Kid and learning some ninja shit from Mr. Miyagi at least 10 times. Watch and learn. Sensei’s know shit. Pay attention.
6. Stay Focused – Being one with the dance floor takes a lot of focus. Focus your attention on movements like body rolling, it will make your “movement linguistics” more fluid.
7. Get Ya Light Feet Going – “Getting light” looks easy, but it’s not. Practice getting light by tap dancing or clogging.
8. Pop That– When all else fails and the technicality of body intellect becomes overwhelming, revert to putting your hands up on your knees and your bows on your thighs. It always works. Trust.
9. Serve It Up– Supreme dancers never get served. You do not, I repeat, do not, want a dude who looks like Raz B telling you “you got served.”
10. Lil Saint– This is the last and final rule to mastering Maybach O’s Body Intellect. Make sure you remember everything you do is for Lil Saint and only Lil Saint. The lil homie ain’t die for no reason, so dance motherf*cker. (If this statement is over your head, see You Got Served for point of reference).
If, and only if, one follows all of these dance steps will you subsequently have the body intellect of 1,000 Maybach O’s.
Always remember, keep it cute and pop THAT when all else fails.
Brittany Lewis is the Music Editor at GlobalGrind and a Howard University Alumna. Brittany considers herself seasoned on all the pop culture ish that matters. Follow her on Twitter @Buttercup_B.
