Flashback to nearly a decade ago- The Pussycat Dolls was the hottest girl group around, with Nicole Scherzinger as its leading lady. But today, inside the latest issue of Cosmopolitan UK, she’s revealing that it was actually one of the darkest times of her life.
“It’s sad to see how I wasted my life. I had such a great life on the outside, the Dolls were on top of the world but I was miserable on the inside. I’m never letting that happen again; you only get one life – I was 27 only once.”
For almost 10 years, the 36-year-old singer had a battle with bulimia, one that, as Cosmo’s Jacqui Meddings puts it, “almost stole her twenties.” It wasn’t until she blacked out while on tour when she decided enough was enough:
“I had started losing my voice, I couldn’t sing at shows, and then I remember my manager finding me passed out on the floor in Malta or in the south of France. I thought, ‘I’m going to lose everything I love if I don’t love myself.’”
On the front page of the glossy, Nicole radiates in a double denim ensemble looking filled with the confidence that she once lacked in the past. Keep on reading for more from her cover story and to see some stunning shots from her spread.
On finding her confidence:
“I get past my shyness by making everything about others and not thinking about myself. That’s what I did on “The X Factor” – I can be goofy and playful when it’s about the acts. They are like my babies. But when I’m off stage I’m not as big and animated. People know they could have a pint with me, they know I work hard… but for me all my smiles and confidence are a triumph because it came from a broken place.”
On sharing her story:
“Thinking about it I try not to well up… It is such a horrible paralysing disease and it was such a dark time for me. That’s why I can empathise so much with people who have demons and voices in their heads, who aren’t nice to themselves. It robs you of living your life. But you can recover and you can get rid of it forever. I did it and that’s why it’s so important for me to share my story. I felt so alone… but I made myself so alone. You hide it from the world, you isolate yourself. But you can beat it – do not give up because you’re so special and you’re meant for such great things.”
The issue hits stands July 3.
PHOTO CREDIT & SOURCE: Cosmopolitan UK
