The era of the Independent Woman . . . 2009 and 2010 . . .Ne-Yo loves her because ‘she got her own’ . . . I-N-D-E-P-E-N-D-E-N-T . . Lil Boosie spelled it out for us! Destiny’s Child gave us a very in-depth definition of the term with their song Independent Woman.. . .but the independent woman is a term that does not stand alone when it comes to being defined.
I consider myself a good listener! I guess this characteristic is the reason a lot of people talk to me. I don’t always always have an opinion, instead I know when a simple acknowledgement is needed in any situation. So I watch and listen to women everyday . . . my sisters of every background, profession, style . . . you name it. And I hate to admit it but some of us give the independent woman a bad name.
How many times have you heard . . .
‘I don’t need no man to do nothing for me . . . ‘
‘I can pay my own bills, get my own hair done . . . take care of my own kids . . . ‘
If I had a dollar for every time I heard it or even said it . . . I would be rich. And if I had a dollar for every female that has said these words in some shape and fashion . . . and didn’t live it . . . I would be even richer.
How do you call yourself an independent woman when you live above your means . . . leaving you no choice but to find ‘that man’ to dig you out of your financial troubles? Whether it is having multiple children or trying to live a champagne life with your little beer money . . . you cannot be an independent woman when you are living a life you can’t afford. Because you are the first to run to a man to pick up the slack . . . and will give him the blues if he doesn’t. An independent woman doesn’t just bring home the bacon and cook it . . . but she knows how to manage it.
Otherwise . . . you are simply . . . ‘The Dependant Woman in DENIAL’ . . . Here are a few examples . . hopefully you don’t find yourself in one of these categories . . . .
‘Hair done . . nails done . . everything did . . . . ‘ I mean you and your kids stay sharp . . . house decked out . . . only the best of the best for you . . . . how do you do it with no job . . . . no food in your regrigerator, electricity, water and gas turned off or the bill is skyhigh from your penny pinching payments so you can stay fly . . . . and the eviction notice is on the door . . . I’m just sayin’ . . . .You are . . . . THE DEPENDENT WOMAN IN DENIAL!
Can you honestly say that you are an indendent woman if you have multiple children . . . possibly with multiple men . . . and you don’t have a job? Instead, you depend on DCFS, Social Security and whatever other outlet of what you consider to be ‘free money’ to care for your children? Instead, you depend on the children’s fathers . . who didn’t have anything and didn’t amount to anything to begin with . . . and cuss em out when they can’t give you what you need and want . . . . You are . . . . THE DEPENDENT WOMAN IN DENIAL!
Oh you got it going on . . you don’t even work for anyone . . you are an entrepreneur . . you have some real estate . . .a catering company or something . . . but again . . . the kids are hungry, the electricity, water, and gas are off or set for disconnection and the eviction notice is on the door . . . . there is a big difference between struggling to fulfill your dreams and just straight up suffering to fulfill them . . . I learned this lesson the hard way . . . You and I are