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Before Beyoncé‘s sixth studio album dropped back in 2016, it was considered treasonous to question her relationship with longtime love Jay-Z. Up until Lemonade, the pair had been intensely private about their marriage and family—but when the album dropped and featured songs like “Pray You Catch Me,” “Sorry,” and “Hold Up,” Bey let the world know that, at some point, there was trouble in paradise.

Then, on 4:44, a sort of response to Bey’s accusations…Jay apologized and said it took having kids for him to be able to see life through a woman’s eyes. I’ll f*ck up a good thing if you let me/Let me alone, Becky…

While the Carters let us in, there was still so much to know… for instance, who is Becky with the good hair? What was it like when they weren’t on the same page? Did our relationship goals nearly split and call it quits? We don’t have the details, but one Beyoncé fan page is imagining some of those moments for us…and we can’t. stop. reading.

Interpreting a photo of Jay-Z trying to pick Blue Ivy up as she cries and clings to her mother in Antibes, France, Joy Mechell writes

Beyonce, Jay-Z, Blue Ivy in Antibes, France

“‘Go to daddy’ Bey whispered to her daughter. When Jay went to reach for her, Blue snatched away and buried her face in her mother’s neck.’Please,’ Bey asked. Eventually Blue let him take her but Bey could tell this was far from over. When they got to their hotel, Jay laid Blue down for her nap before he opening the door. ‘Where are you going?’ Bey asked. She honestly didn’t want them to be on bad terms right now, especially over something that happened over a year ago. He didn’t answer her but he didn’t leave either. Eventually he closed the door and mounted the bed, pulling Blue into his arms carefully as not to wake her from her peaceful slumber. Bey watched them interact, the guilt sinking in as she tried to keep her original reasoning. ‘You’re the reason she’s acting like this’ he said, breaking the silence. ‘I’m the reason? You’re lucky my child is sleeping or—’ ‘OUR child Bey. She’s our child and you took her from me,’ he says in a strained tone. ‘You act as if I wasn’t going to let you see her ever again, you know I would never do that’ Bey argued. ‘I don’t know you at all. Not after I came home to an empty house and y’all stuff missing. So when was I supposed to see her Bey? When you decided to stop ignoring my calls? Not telling me you were in a whole different country so I could find you?’ he asked trying to keep his voice down. ‘I needed a break Shawn! I deserved a break and no I wasn’t going to leave her behind. I’m sorry it seemed like I did it out of spite but in that moment I was just reacting. I didn’t even plan on staying long, I just couldn’t be around you after hearing that’ Bey said as she thought back onto the most painful time of her life. ‘I would never keep her from you, or any kids we might have, just because we’re fighting. Even if we divorce I—’ ‘We’re not getting a divorce,’Jay interrupted. Bey sighed as remembering to pick her battles. She couldn’t see them divorced either but she can’t say separation never crossed her mind. Jay was about to say something else when Blue squirmed, wrapping her arms tightly around him while he rocked her. He knew he messed up but he couldn’t imagine losing them.Those two weeks were the wake up call he needed. Straighten up or he’d lose his wife #fiction.”

How do you think it went down? Head to Joy’s page for more fan fiction about your unbreakable faves.

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