Hello, fellas. As you probably know, today is Valentine’s Day. And if you’re one of those dudes who didn’t get a gift for your bae yet, you’re shit out of luck. Gifts are gone. Restaurants are booked. And roses are like $50 dollars a stem.
You can, however, get her a cool card. And that’s where we come in. This year, we wanted to create some beautiful VDay cards that you could give your bae. There was a problem, though: we aren’t the best writers in the world. We needed help from a real poet.
So we went to one of the great wordsmiths of our time: Florida rapper Plies, the author of songs like “Bust it Baby” “Becky,” “Good Dick” and “Ol’ Lady,” (an especially heartwarming song about getting revenge on someone who owes you money by fucking his girlfriend).
If Ain’t Fuckin U Raw Don’t Be Expecting Nothin From Me 4 Valentines Day….
— Plies (@plies) February 13, 2014
Using quotes from Plies’ stellar Twitter account, here are GlobalGrind’s official VDay cards. Scroll down and check them out. And enjoy your day, lovers.
PHOTO SOURCE: Getty, Instagram