Last night, while scrolling through the Instagram feed of random pictures from my friends, I fell in love with Zosia Mamet.
I mean, I loved her before, but Lena Dunham’s picture, above, sealed the deal. I immediately thought Zosia should date a brother.
Not just any guy, a brother exactly like myself. Translation: Me.
So to help sway her opinion, I decided to craft this blog in an effort to make my dream come true: I want to take Zosia out on a date.
This is the only reason that matters.
I could show her a whole new world and we’d be in the club like….
After our glorious first date, Zosia will be like…
I make a mean glass of Kool-Aid.
Zosia once told Glamour magazine, “If you’ve already Lewis-and-Clarked my body, maybe buy my oatmeal.” So as a joke, I’d be like this at dinner: “You want me to pay the check? Just kidding.”
I’d tell Zosia that opposites attract.
Contrary to popular belief, you don’t need to do this to attract a black guy.
I heard you do music…
It sounds amazing, but I know a guy who does beats. Maybe we can remix “Bleak Love.”
Plus you know what they say…Once you go black.
Did I mention I was awesome?
OK not that awesome, but still.
If I got to take Zosia out on a date, I’d feel like this.
Photo Credit: Reddit/Instagram/Getty
