TALES OF A HUSSY: Pants Off
It’s just before sunrise and you’re gathering your belonging to make a mad dash out of last night’s hookups apartment. Well, it’s inevitable that your favorite earrings are going to be left behind. Hell, maybe even a shoe depending on how much of a mess you are in the morning. Everyone’s had his or her share of walks of shame — or as I like to call it ‘The Stride Of Pride.’
A fellow hussy — well, actually, let’s just refer to her as Leader of the Pack — has lost everything from her panties to her pants. Yes, her pants. It’s one thing walk home commando in high heels in your best freakum dress through a snow storm, but it’s a whole ‘nother level of ridiculous to walk home through the ghetto in pants that certainly are not yours.
How’d she lose said Pants? Not how you’d imagine. During a cuddle session/sleepover with her BGF/Sometime-Hookup, somewhere between passing out on the couch and her apparent tendency to sleepwalk, her pants just went missing. A thorough search of the apartment revealed no leads. Where does a pair of pants go?! This mystery may never be solved, but as for suspects in the case — I pin the hookup’s ROOMMATE. Yeah, you, roommate with the fetish for women’s skinny jeans. We get it: you like the way your ass looks in them. Now, return the pants back to the Hussyhood promptly and we can all forget this ever happened.
XXX,
Hussy
