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A couple nights ago Steve Harvey and Nightline’s Vicki Mabrey mediated a town hall like debate on “Why Can’t a Successful Black Woman Find A Man? ” When I first saw the advertisement for the show, an inner volcano began to erupt as I thought, “Why are black women all to blame?” Initially, I told myself I will not watch this foolery, and urged my girlfriends to watch Chelsea Lately in its place. As the start time for the show loomed I drifted into a comma like sleep and completely missed Chelsea Lately and Nightline’s Black Women bashing festival. When I woke up on Thursday, I had 16 text messages from my girlfriends and my aunt highlighting key moments from the show. So now, compelled to deliver my opinion, I hurried to work and searched the web for the full episode.

Once I found it I devoted my full attention to internalizing what I heard, and what I found was Sherri Shepard and Jacque Reid didn’t speak to my dating woes at all. Check out Sherri outlining some of her dating requirements:

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Now who wants help taking their weaves out? I was so ticked off that Sherri took it there, but her other points seemed to be super valid, so I formulated this question, “What’s wrong with black men these days?” Instead of always blaming black women for ‘the problem’, have we ever thought that our black men aren’t being raised to be men? My grandma always says, “Point a finger, three more are pointing at you?” These are my concerns with the dating poll as a young successful black woman in NYC. I live in Harlem and I love the rich cultural background it has, but for every five males I see walking down the street four of them have their pants sagging so low that they are forced to walk cocked leg. Now here I am 23 years old, why would I dare want a man who hasn’t properly mastered the art of getting dressed?  A man that is so heavily influenced by Jim Jones and Juelz Santana that they mirror their way of dressing in an attempt to fit in. A man so unaware of history that he doesn’t know that wearing his pant so low and revealing his underwear, was once a way homosexuals identified each other in the village for sexual encounters. Its what I like to call the &ld