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Kate Middleton is preparing for her big day, which will take place in the wee hours of Friday morning. While most Americans will be asleep when she says “I do!” we’ll replay this moment over and over again in our minds and on TV.

With that said, GlobalGrind has obtained a last minute list of Kate’s ‘celebrity bridesmaids’ and we hear that they will give movie “Bridesmaids” Kristen Wiig and Rose Byrne a run for their money.

So in complete defiance of the British monarchy, we are about to publish Kate Middleton’s top secret list of bridesmaids, including who designed the bride’s wedding dress!

Read on to find out more.

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We have learned that one of Kate Middleton’s bridesmaids will be none other than Lady Gaga. She also made Kate’s dress, which is not really a dress, but an oversized egg made of potato skins.

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Another bridesmaid is Lindsay Lohan, who was also resposonible for the after party entertainment. While Lindsay is currently leading the sober life, guests are expecting one hell of a blast. One must assume she still knows were to get the best stuff on earth.

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Kim Kardashian is also one of Kate Middleton’s bridesmaids. They say always a bridesmaid, never a bride, but Kim Kardashian is America’s princess and once she catches the bouquet, she’ll be next in line for a ring.

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We might not be used to seeing Queen Latifah in a dress, but she’s a bridesmaid just in case someone gets out of line. She’ll put them in a scorpion death lock, give them an attitude adjustment, slash ‘Tombstone Pile Driver’ … Well you get the point, she’ll kick some royal ass. 

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Since Lindsay is throwing the party, Snooki is there to drink all the liquor and provide a different kind of protection. We heard those bachelorette parties get pretty wild.

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Lastly, the Maid of Honor will be none other than Nicki Minaj herself. From Roman to Barbie, or whatever other name she is calling herself these days, Nicki is the best friend we’d all love to have.

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