When I heard of the death/suicide of Chris Lighty, my first gut response was, “Wow I can relate to the pain that will cause someone to feel that ‘I am alone and I want this to be over and there is no way out!'”
We walk around every day wearing a mask. Hiding our pain and constantly taking in the pain of others. Building and building the hurt, never finding a real way to release, caught in a whirlwind of self destruction. Some of us lash out on others, some of us lash out on ourselves, very few of us find away rid the inner pain. It cuts like a knife everyday, taking away your love for life.
Wow, I have so much to say but think you don’t really care! From politician that act like they care about the death of Black and Latino children only until they get their “vote,” to people that have power to change things and tell you to bring them 14 proposals in 14 different ways just to say we can’t help you, to a senior citizen that works hard all their life just to be told, you have to buy more medicine than your income can afford! No food for you this month sorry, and your sickness that we created will never be cured, to a community that provides nothing for their youth and questions why they are so angry, to bills that exceed what we bring in and stress you to death…..because you saw a way you can have a quality of life you deserve, to a young girl who is 13 and would rather turn tricks then go school cause the “corny,” “intelligent” and “peaceful” kid is a NON-FACTOR, they ain’t about “The Life.” To young boy who is only 11, packing a gun and feels only way to be accepted is to “GET IT IN,” to parent who has to work 3 jobs just to survive and doesn’t have time to be home and raise their child, now want to live “That Life” they see on videos, reality TV, or streets.
What do we do when the pain takes over your brain, makes you go insane bringing an end to a life that shined so bright, seemed like it never rained…the stories in our head makes us believe there is no answer, the false images of society gives life to the stories in our head… Our days cut short our journey now defined by our ending! And you never had a chance to step in, to really be a brother, sister, or friend….talking to me about the reality of things that brought my life to an end! You stood by and watched as my insides died, as my actions cried out LOUD, telling everyone I was living a lie! You never had the chance to grab my hand let me know there was really somebody by my side! Couldn’t you see the false interpretation of me and now all you get to do is say RIP as I lay lifeless wishing my soul could really be free!
I am gone, the pain I could not bare and now you wish for me to RIP (Rest In Peace) and I would have much rather you helped me LIP (Live In Peace).
We must learn to be more compassionate….. Slow down and find internal PEACE so our life can be the light to help our children truly Live FREE, Extraordinary!! And Be Consciously Present for every moment of their LiFe!
Chris Lighty, your energy/pain sheds light on me today when my own pain was oh so deep! I pull my mask back a little more on this journey to be one day Pain Free!
I Love My LIFE!!
Erica Ford is the founder of LIFE Camp, Inc. a non-profit that teaches violence prevention in schools.
Help us build the “I Love My LIFE’s (Loving Internally Frees Emotional Scars) Healing center” A place where healing begins! PeaceIsALIFEStyle.com …… ☮❤
