It’s that time of the year when the nights get longer and the weather gets colder – boo season! Baaaaaaybee I can’t keep a man in my bed because I’m cuddling with my girlfriends.
My beautiful, hard working, independent and drop dead gorgeous single girlfriends. Yes single, apparently Kat Stacks has dropped the standards bar below zero.
My job is non-stop, 24-7 to the point I think I mother nature pays me a visit thinking ‘oh he’s one of the girls too!’ You heterosexual men say I’m the luckiest man in the world but really I’m doing majority of you a favor!
Gays are a girls best friend because today’s society is man dominated. Us gays and women share some of the same problems in dealing with discrimination and domination. This is why GAYS not diamonds, are a girls best friend!
Typically you would think a gays duties are on Sunday’s for brunch, Thursday nights for cocktails on the town, Friday for happy hour after work and Saturday afternoons for some shopping relief. WRONG!
Because of you men and your un-affectionate behaviors which isn’t limited to not returning calls/texts in a timely manner, tweeting inappropriate tweets and let’s not go there about the uploading of photos on Facebook that suggest different behavior than you reported!
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So in the midst of all that drama, we gays with no college degree in psychology get to play counselor quoting lyrics from Mary J. Blige albums over wine, chocolate cake and Sex In The City dvds.
So to cover the basics: Girls love gays becasue – 1) we dog/cat sit when they go out of town 2) we liven up any situation 3) we’re quick to defend our girlfriends honor 4) will tell our girlfriends ‘yes you’re being a whore but Im not judging’ 5) we tryna get a ring on it too 6) we love juicy gossip!
Destiny’s Child could have sang it better, ‘I’m your girl, your my girl. Don’t you know that I love you.’ Though we cannot give our girlfriends that intimacy that they desire, we give them our undivided attention.
We pay attention to our girlfriends hair, new twitter avatar, compliment them on new shoes and even notice when they make adjustments around the house. You men on the other hand only notice weight gain, other women passing by and what time the football game is coming on.
It’s not that we gays don’t have a life of our own but we as well enjoy pedicures, manicures and spa days. Don’t let it be a time when she gets his credit card when she’s mad, oh we are Bonnie & Clyde for the day!
Guys always claim ‘gays get away with murder’ but its actually murder for us at times. Sure we don’t mind a flash here and there, yes we help select sexy lingerie in effort to help you out in your relationship intimacy issues and yes on girls night, we give advice to our girlfriends of how to better please YOU!
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We would know, trust me! Our girlfriends can confide in us about their self-esteem concerns, drama with work along with those random ex’s who pop up and appear to be the solution to a straining situation – we ‘the gays’ help with the rational reasoning in these matters.
In this day in age witht the whole DL saga going on, it’s hard for a woman to honestly accept a man is masculine if he does listen too much or is over accommodating.
So men please understand, we’re not trying to take your spot even though it’s been offered
