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So in bizarre-shit-that-happens-in-Florida news, there are some monkeys running around trying to give everyone herpes.

Well, that’s not exactly fair. But there are hundreds of herpes-infected monkeys roaming Florida and wildlife officials are worried that they could be a public health hazard. But how did this happen?

Wildlife officials said that three pairs of Rhesus monkeys were transported to a park near Ocala in the 1930s by tour operator Colonel Tooey after a “Tarzan” flick sparked a fascination with the creature.

But the breed has since boomed and more than 1,000 of the monkeys now live in the state, wildlife officials say.

State officials have caught more than 700 of the monkeys in the past decade — most of which tested positive for the herpes-B virus.

This wouldn’t be an issue if they stayed on the small island near Silver River where they were initially marooned. But the monkeys learned how to swim and have been spotted hundreds of miles away near Jacksonville.

Not to worry. The chances of you contracting anything are low. Just stay away from the packs.


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