Say it ain’t so. Word on the street is that Fox News’ biggest earner, Glenn Beck, is bouncing from his daily show. Beck confirmed the news to his faithful audience on Wednesday night telling them, “I am going to leave this program later this year, but I am not leaving Fox,” Who would ever thought this day would come?
Beck went on to express to his viewers, “We will find each other again, I’m developing other content for Fox…I will continue to tell the story and I’m going to be showing you other ways for us to connect. But I have other things to do.” Beck seems actually to be bowing out gracefully.
So in true GlobalGrind fashion, we have to replace Glenn Beck. Who can fill his shoes? Luckily we have the right candidates for the job.
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Gary Busey
The bugged-eyed veteran actor would fit perfectly in Beck’s spot. Honestly, has Beck ever said anything that was different from things Busey has said?
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Flavor Flav
Let’s face it, Fox News isn’t known for their diversity. A face of color is seriously needed in Beck’s time slot. Flav would fit in perfectly.
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Michele Bachmann
If there was one thing Beck was known for, it was his army. Bachmann has her own army: the tea party.
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R. Kelly
Now stay with us on this one, R. Kelly hasn’t been seen on TV in a long time. He would add some musical swagger to the show and it would be fun.
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Brooke-Lynn
Lawrence Campbell, the man who allegedly performed oral sex on rap producer Mister Cee. We can’t have someone who is the exact same person as Beck, so lets go off the grid — a young black gay man who dresses up as a woman. If that isn’t the complete opposite of Glenn Beck, we don’t know what is.
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Stephen Baldwin
Remember what Baldwin said about Obama, “Homey made this bed, now he has got to lay in it…Barack Obama is the greatest gangster to ever come out of Chicago…He’s a cultural terrorist.”
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Charlie Sheen
Not only would this move be smart, but it would be ‘Sheenious.’ Roger Ailes needs to call up Charlie Sheen immediately and put him back in television, in this situation everybody would be WINNING!
