A couple of years ago (about 200 years, give or take) Jesus fasted for 40 days and night, essentially proving he was the real deal Holyfield. It was an amazing feat: one that folks honor to this day.
You see, today is Ash Wednesday, and the first day of Lent. Basically, good God-fearing Catholics give up something that is important to them for 40 days.
Basically, you make a sacrifice, similar to the sacrifice the Man Upstairs’ son made.
Like every occasion, we flipped it, using our favorite hip-pop celebrities.
Now, warning: we don’t know if these people are Christians or whatever…but who cares.
Here’s what your fave celebrities are giving up for Lent this year.
Lil Wayne will give up all of his alliances with Trukfit.
Chris Brown will give up posting all those cliché, melodramatic, feel-sorry-for-me-please pictures.
Chief Keef will stop pissing off his C.O.
Rick Ross will stop pissing off real gangstas.
Rick Ross will also give up eating heavy carbs after 7 PM.
Kanye West will give up dress to impress. He will just throw on whatever.
Ditto for The-Dream.
Taylor Swift will give up acting like every single white girl, ever.
Mariah will stop giving Nicki Minaj the stank face on American Idol.
And Nicki will stop trying to physically harm Mariah.
Waka Flocka will give up retweeting stupid sh*t no one cares about.
Beyonce and Jay will give up the blanket, let Blue Ivy breathe.
Look how sad Blue Ivy looks :- (
Justin Bieber will stop hangin’ with ratchet folks.
Drake will give up trying to look cool.
Rihanna will give up nothin!’