What’s better than reading stories about dogs who saved their owner’s life, watching Vines of smart pups doing tricks, or the promise of a cuddly friend forever?
Sure, having a dog seems like a lot of fun, but for first-time pup owners, getting to a point where you and your little one are synced and the best of friends can be tiresome.
But immensely funny and rewarding.
Take it from a new mom chasing a feisty rat terrier around the house who already knows how to climb over his gates.
It’s really hard work. SO FRIGGIN CUTE…but hard. Here are a few things no one offered to tell me before I picked up my new best friend.
They’ll hijack your bed:
You know that really expensive Martha Stewart Pets doggy bed you bought at PetSmart that’s in the shape of a boat with a cute stuffed anchor to match? Take it back. You new pup friend will certainly try to hijack your bed and use his cries and barks to get his way. Trust me. Sleep is nonexistent around these parts.
They’re messy eaters:
Not like you were expecting the puppy to use utensils, but don’t be surprised at how much actually ends up on the floor. But like, really dude? It’s kind of ridiculous…
They love a good spoon:
AKA get ready to smell like dog. Because these little monsters are serious about their people time.
And they are really ambitious:
They’ll try anything once. Or twice. Or…actually, they really never learn their lesson.
So they’ll probably end up like this a few times:
And that’s what they get…
They don’t need toys:
Because the world around them is enough to keep them occupied. Save your coins for some Febreze…
Because they smell bad…and need lots of baths:
Wouldn’t you if you had fur covering every inch of your body?
They’re really bad at catch:
So turn off the dog shows on Animal Planet and face the reality that your puppy is a bumbling mess right now. Fetch will come later.
But really good at finding you wherever you go:
AKA borderline annoying…
They’re super high maintenance:
Like seriously dog, you need gravy on your Wellness bites? Super high absorbent pee-pee pads? A massage to go to sleep every night?
And will look at you incredulously when you tell them no:
Sir, you are not a human being…
But at the end of the day, the money, time, poop is worth it…if you get to look at this insanely cute face all day:
Like…he’s so cute, we just can’t!
Until he shits on your carpet…again:
Wait, why did I get a puppy?
PHOTO CREDIT: Giphy, Getty