Picture this: several years ago one of my favorite philosophers, Confucius also became my least favorite the minute I came across this quote:’ It is the law of nature that woman should be held under the dominance of man.’ Ohhhh… that quote sure did infuriate me instantly. However, that same quote led me to gear towards George Bernard Shaw’s quote ‘“I would like to take you seriously, but to do so would be an affront to your intelligence” as my way of retaliating to Confucius’ quote herein. Honestly, the latter quote may have worked for me professionally, but as far as romantic relationships are concern, my absurd ego sabotaged my previous engagements. If change from my part doesn’t take place even the current or future intimate relationships I choose to partake in will go down the drain.
My dominant personality seems to bring about such imprudence in my way of addressing my point across to my partner. It’s one thing to be independent, but it’s another thing when we start to put dominance in the same category with independence. Yes, I must admit that I may be considerate and compassionate to everyone else in the world except for the person who happens to be the closest to me, my partner. I never ceased to follow this principle that when dealing with people, we are not dealing with creatures of logic. We are dealing with creatures of emotion, creatures bustling with prejudices and motivated by pride and vanity. However, I tend to not incorporate the same principles to my romantic relationships. As far as romantic relationships are concern, my expectations seem to be beyond every human being’s grasp. All relationships involve give-and-take and cooperation, so when I find myself in a situation where I force myself to habitually attend to my partner’s ordinary requests or suggestions like a bull to a red flag, all else fails in that relationship. Even though I still take care of them and eventually gets my way, the fact that I had full control, creates a bigger gap for me to feel at ease to show any of my vulnerabilities. Thus, making it a lose/lose situation to regain my interest. Not because my partner wasn’t strong enough, stable enough or wise enough, but because I reel them in to the point where I get my way. Yet sure enough my respect towards them dissipates when I perceive how comfortable they get. Yes I could list a million things to validate my dominance, but I choose to refrain from making excuses to my obliterate approach towards this particular area of my life. Think about it: How can I manage to keep balance in all areas of my life and consistently thrive not less than 100% on whatever I embark on including my romantic relationships and yet I approach the latter differently that even though the physical passion remains up to par, I end up being astray from my partner emotionally & mentally that I eventually get cold feet? Rubbish! Grrr…
I know the saying “It takes two to Tango,” but in my case I take full accountability of my failed engagements. My good friend, Brendon never ceased to address my complexities and my absurd high standards on men that he would not dare try to set me up with anyone less than what he perceives to meet my standards…hahaha… and he refers to it as a rare breed of men.
My poor man had to deal with my complexities, but I am working on it because his patience, love and loyalty are just so remarkable to ignore. Talk about imprudence, I was so inconsiderate tonight that as much as I can manipulate the situation to be his fault, I ought to apologize for being a spoiled brat. It’s not acceptable. Again, it’s one thing to be independent, but it’s another thing to be absurdly dominant. We all have choices to conduct things accordingly, and I choose to put a halt to my usual unnecessary approach to romantic relationships. I will conclude this note with these powe
