state of florida
A man in Florida won a $3 million lottery scratch off jackpot this past weekend. Which would otherwise be a good thing. Except the Florida man with the nice cash flow coming to him is a child molester. Timothy Poole, 43, played the Super Millions scratch-off game that costs $20 a ticket and ended up […]
Houston Rockets basketball player Dwight Howard is under criminal investigation for alleged child abuse in Georgia. Center Dwight Howard is now undergoing an active criminal investigation for beating his 6-year-old son, Braylon, with a belt back in August. Howard was initially cleared of the allegations but things turned sour on Monday when the Cobb County Georgia […]
If You Don’t Know! News & Politics Roundup: Newark Police Search For Witnesses In Case Of Slain Cheerleader…AND MORE!
Newark, New Jersey Police are looking for potential witnesses following the killing of a high school cheerleader that took place just two weeks after graduation. Cheyanne Bond, 17, was shot and became Newark’s third homicide in a 24-hour period last weekend. Since the killing, local officials have put up signs calling any witnesses to come forward […]
In today’s edition of “Stories from Florida,” we learned how one man found the ultimate coin purse, and how another’s careless mistake caused a baby to lose its life. We can’t make this stuff up. The Wrong Hole When the going gets tough, the tough shove things up their bum. According to FCN News, 30-year-old Tyrone Booker was […]
Well, you can’t say this isn’t creative. A Central Florida man who weighs about 450 pounds is in some deep trouble after attempting to hide 23 grams of marijuana under his stomach fat. Yep, that totally happened. According to a new release, a Volusia County sheriff’s deputy stopped a vehicle Friday after noticing that the […]
Today in “Stories from Florida,” we have a Floridian who beat his brother with a marijuana plant and another who peed on a man’s lawn and shot him when he complained about it. We can’t make this stuff up. Weed Wacker: Florida man Rodney Brown was arrested over the weekend after allegedly beating his brother […]
Cheeseburgers are meant to eat. But in Florida, apparently they are also meant to be weapons. A 23-year-old man was arrested last week after he hit a pregnant family member with the edible goodness and then shoved her. Yep, that happened. According to arrest reports, the victim told sheriff’s deputies 23-year-old Taylor Allen Stephens of […]
Meanwhile, In Florida: High School Senior Banned From Graduation After Engraving Giant Penis Into School’s Field…AND MORE!
Man, kids in Florida can be such dicks. For “Meanwhile, in Florida” this week, we look at a student who drew an obscene object into his school’s grass, an appropriately-titled sex ring, and huge holes in the ground. So, leggo. Florida’s Shlong We start off in Brooksville, where a graduating senior was barred from his commencement after he […]
Today in “Stories from Florida,” we have a man who first sued Apple for selling him a computer that aided in his addiction to porn, and now wants to marry said porn-filled computer. We also have a congressional candidate who is accused of plagiarizing the current congressman. We can’t make this stuff up. Holy Matrimony: Mark […]
Good news out of Florida this week, as the state Senate approved in-state tuition for illegal immigrants on Thursday — a move that is sure to set the stage for other states considering passing laws to make higher education accessible to those without permanent U.S. residency. The Florida tuition equity bill will bring the number […]
Meanwhile In Florida: Teen Girl Fakes Kidnapping To Win Back Boyfriend, Zombie Apocalypse Bill Is A Thing (DETAILS)
Today in “Stories From Florida,” we have a teenager who faked her own kidnapping to elicit sympathy from an ex-boyfriend and a Florida State Senator determined to pass a “zombie apocalypse” bill because…reasons. We can’t make this stuff up. Desperate Measures: As if we needed another reason to deem today’s teenagers “the worst in history,” […]
UPDATE: 2:00 PM EST Jameis Winston has been suspended by the Florida State baseball team following his misdemeanor citation Tuesday. FSU baseball Coach Mike Martin says, “As a result of his citation last night, we are suspending Jameis Winston from the baseball team.“I am confident he will complete his community service obligation and the situation will […]